Pick Your Battles, Not Your Nose


In addition to gearing up for the production and release of my forthcoming children’s book, rewriting my novel, and writing a slew of new articles for health and fitness magazines, I’ve also been very happily collaborating on an animated screenplay with three dear and talented friends: Sarah Blutt, Dave Eagleman, and Tobey Forney. We’re keeping the logline under wraps for now, but I will tell you that it has something to do with microbiology. Who knew that microbes could be so capricious, so protean, so heroic, so…funny?

In honor of our being nearly finished with the screenplay, I offer up some relevant medical vocabulary for your consideration.

  • Epistaxis: n. the occurrence of hemorrhage from the nose.
  • Mitochondrion: n. a membrane-enclosed subunit of a cell that generates the cell’s supply of chemical energy.
  • Mucophagy: n. the consumption of mucus or dried mucus.
  • Olfaction: n. the sense of smell.
  • Rhinotillexis: n. the act of extracting dried nasal mucus or foreign bodies from the nose with a finger.
  • Rhinotillexomania: n. an obsessive-compulsive disorder characterized by chronic nose-picking.
  • Turbinate: n. a long, narrow and curled bone shelf (shaped like an elongated sea-shell) that protrudes into the breathing passage of the nose.
  • Viscous colloidal mucus: n. snot.